The stuff is fucking everywhere!!
‘The steets of Paris contain the finest collection of dog shits I ever saw.’
Un poème pour vous:
This mofo got style!
This mofo got the look!
This mofo got sex appeal!
This mofo got it goin’ on!
This mofo knows the score!
This mofo gotta go poop for sure!
Following on from our last episode we now take public defecation to an all new level and as again demonstrated below, public facilities in Paris are in dire need of repair and renovation.
This was previously a prime spot to let your fluids flow, locals are said to have come here
for generations to release their demons in peace and harmony.
Now the intoxicated stench of sun steamed urine seeps from its base, ungrateful youths desecrate the decor with their insolent graffiti whilst crusty troll like tramps spray the contents of their infected bowels up the walls.
If you live close to a park in Paris or are lucky enough to have a spot of greenery nearby then you’re most probably used to dodging dog shit on a daily basis. Adventuring further away from these areas you start to feel confident, can hold your head up high and walk in a straight line without the worry of slipping up in doggy diarrhea.
Watch out though. This does not apply to areas such as the 6th, 7th and 16th known to be densely populated by little old ladies and their priceless toy poodles.
You’ll find defecated ass goblins scattered far and wide, in every place and in every direction, so beware and keep your eyes on your toes!!
Paris isn’t particularly well known for it amazing sports facilities, nor are Parisians famous for their sporting talents.
You’ll find a local gym to keep your muscles toned and a public swimming pool to catch something in but there is one sport which could take Paris to the top.
That’s right! Skiing is the one activity that many Parisians practice on a daily basis thanks to all the dog shit spread throughout the city.
Walking can be one of the best ways to discover Paris. As you stroll through the streets you’re bound to bump into some friendly locals, chat with happy shop keepers or bond with groups of kind-hearted youths.
You’ll come across quaint little boutiques, award-winning chocolatiers, Michelin featured eateries and numerous thirst quenching cafés!
Just be sure to use the toilet before you carry on your adventure through the city as to not end up faced with one of these stunning public shitteries and no other options.